


When He Wasn’t Looking

by JustJenLea



Series: She is Love [3]
Category: Criminal Minds (US TV)
Genre: Babies, Domestic Fluff, Fatherhood, Gay Parents, Kid Fic, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-30
Updated: 2019-07-30
Packaged: 2020-07-27 07:50:40
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 567
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20042476
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JustJenLea/pseuds/JustJenLea
Summary: Sometimes transitions are so seamless, you don't realize when they occur.That’s how Derek Morgan takes to being a dad.





	When He Wasn’t Looking

Derek Morgan isn't sure when they became fathers. 

If he asked Spencer, he would probably say something like The second she was born. Until that moment, she was ours but she wasn't.

He knows this is a valid answer but it's not quite the one he wants. 

Madison's three months old. She's still a newborn but she's starting to form a personality. She has her definite likes and dislikes. She prefers Daddy Spencer to Papa Derek on those late restless nights. Derek thinks it has something to do with the fact that Reid tends to sleep in the rocking chair, holding her, while he puts her in her crib as soon as she's asleep.

Garcia told him the other day that while Maddie was still just a baby, she could see who the pushover would be and that he would have his hands full once she figured it out. Morgan shook it off, telling her she was crazy but now, as he watches Reid admit he couldn't put her down all afternoon, he realizes she may have a point.

Something about their dynamics as a couple have changed. It's nothing major but it's in the way they look at each other and the way they act around each other.

Before Madison, they had no problem going their separate way in the house. It wasn't unusual to find Reid upstairs while Morgan was downstairs. Now they relished every second of time they could spend together, especially when Madison was asleep. It wasn't uncommon to find Reid curled up on the couch, his head in Morgan's lap, reading.

Somewhere in the past three months, they've passed the blurred line between caregiver and parent. Their dinner conversations involve diapers and formula rather than 'adult' topics. Nights alone are things of the past. Garcia has offered to babysit but they are saving that for the day they are forced to travel for work. They want to enjoy the baby days because as they've been told, those days will be gone before they realize it. 

It feels like Maddie's always been there. They can barely remember the time before she was born. It's second nature to refill the diaper bag as soon as they come in. The one time they've gone out alone, they didn't make it through their salad before deciding to just pick up a pizza and spend the evening with Garcia and the baby. 

Everything he's read has told him that there's a defining moment in becoming a parent. Something just sets off the parent mindset. He's not sure he's had this, even though he has that mindset. He'll never forget how he almost lost it the first time Madison vaccinated. She screamed in pain and fury, and he couldn't handle it. 

He had to leave.

As he spends another night up, he wishes she would just go to sleep. It's been three hours and while she's not screaming, she is fussing. He doesn't want to wake Spencer and admit he is clueless. Finally, he takes off his shirt and holds her against him. He's seen Reid do it enough to know she loves skin to skin contact. As she falls asleep, he can't bear to put her down. 

As he watches her sleep with her head on his chest, he realizes that while he wasn't looking, he became a father. 

There was no defining moment.

It just happened.


End file.
